Cover reveal: my new collection forthcoming from Cyberwit. More on this soon.
(Brexit Brokeshit page 16)
In my Eu-topia,
Bureaucrats would be promoted solely on the grounds,
Of honesty, personal honour and due diligence,
An army of friends and an armoury of credentials,
Following after school chums, death-gripping their coattails
Would be grounds for immediate dismissal,
Also, the highest pensions should go to those,
Who don’t make real money,
In their prime,
All right fine,
I’ll eat my Brussels sprouts and go to bed without dessert,
To have night terrors about nativist campaigners,
Because that’s really worked out so well in Europe’s past,
At midnight, I hold tight to my stuffed plush bear, Utopia,
A harmless fantasy, like Santa Claus when I was younger,
It helps keep me sane.
Who cares? Brexit Brokeshit.
Brexit Brokeshit, my collection of 37 poems and prose across 70 pages, now has a new look. Much like the change in the Prime Minister of the UK, the cover of Brexit Brokeshit is different, but the content is the same as the previous one. Another similarity lies in the fact that the change was unelected: this was a mandatory change needed to ensure the title matched the description. Nevertheless, here is a look at the new cover, and let’s hope it doesn’t get spaffed up the wall!
(Ps – I didn’t actually write any of this blurb, it was written by my own personal Dominic Cummings).
Poem on page 6 of Brexit Brokeshit by Joseph Robert
First published in Pyrokinection, May 2013.
Billion Euro Cheeseburger
Billion Euro Cheeseburger, it’s coming soon,
whether through hyperinflation, hypergourmandation, avant-
garde arty stunting, or tax hole ‘sploitation, it is coming,
Billion Euro Cheeseburger,
laugh, don’t laugh, eyebrow arch, eyeball roll, same diff.:
a Billion Euro Cheeseburger’ll be served up, just the same,
‘But will you swallow it?’ will be the question claimed via
MEdia to be on everybody’s oft-spoken-for, static lips.
Billion Euro Cheeseburger, grab her by the buns and list off
every currency name securely deposited in your head, past
present, real and made up, blink and think of their symbols,
cos I can’t be bothered to do it for you anymore for I fear,
Billion Euro Cheeseburger, Happiness Hand Grenades and things
that make as much out of little sense as Grexit, stage left.
Buy a print copy of Brexit Brokeshit on Lulu.
Download the Brexit Brokeshit FREE Pdf Ebook.
Brexit Brokeshit is now available to read online as a free PDF Ebook, free as an unicorn galloping across sunlit uplands.
Available today from Lulu Publishing is Brexit Brokeshit: my collection of poetry and prose on the subject of Brexit, its causes, personalities and conflicts. A righteous statement on the virtues of political impotence, “I’m not racist but…”, political figures and, oh, to hell with all of it…
Joseph Robert detests poems about orchards and racists, not poems about racists, but actual racists. He is 190 centimetres tall, is a firm believer that the Guinness in Dublin is the best due to the rats in the vats, and drinks Bushmills whisky. He likes visiting orchards when the fruit is ripe.